I know you care, but,

You know what the hardest part is?

I know I should not feel this but the feeling still creeps around me,

I know that it will hurt me after but I still want to feel it.

The hardest part?

Every part of me, inside and out, yearns to see you, but another half of me, the rational one, prevents it, pulling me back, stopping me from going to you.

I know what will happen if I do, but I still want to see you. It hurts when things are this way.

I hate this feeling of weakness. I hate this feeling of pain.

You said I'm always sad? Wrong. I was happy. When? Every second when you're with me. Every minute when things isn't what they are now. Every hour when I can see you.

You want me to be happy? You're worried about me? I know that. Truly, I do.

But since you made the decision, then don't worry bout' me kay'? You know things were going to be this way, so why worry now? You understand me better than I do myself, so you should know I would never do anything to make you unhappy.

I keep on asking myself the same question, is it TIME that I need? Maybe.

But if you truly understand, and if you truly care, as long as you're happy everyday, okay, well, maybe not everyday, but most of the time, then it will make my pain more bearable. You want that for me right? =)

Smile kay? =) To me, your smile is the most beautiful thing, an antidote to my pain. Every time I feel unwell, I look for your smile. XD